WHAT’S BEING CLAIMED:
- Bennett Kaspar-Williams, a transgender dad, said medical staff still called him “ma’am” or “mom” during his pregnancy.
- Kaspar-Williams stopped his testosterone hormone therapy so his ovaries could function.
- Despite having a full beard, flat chest, and the “male” gender marker on his documents, he was still misgendered.
A transgender dad who gave birth last year is sharing his story to enlighten others that not everyone who gives birth is a “mother.”
Bennett Kaspar-Williams from Los Angeles gave birth via cesarean to his child with his husband Malik. Little Hudson was born healthy in Oct. 2020.
But during his pregnancy and birth, he said that the medical staff still kept calling him a “mom.”
Kaspar-Williams shared that he realized he was trans in 2011 and started transitioning in 2014. After getting a $5,000 top surgery, he felt that “a huge weight” was lifted off his shoulders.
He didn’t have a bottom surgery yet, so he was still able to conceive. He shared that the whole process of trying to conceive, being successful, and getting pregnant didn’t challenge his gender identity.
Kaspar-Williams said that the only issue was that medical professionals still insisted on identifying him as a woman just because he was carrying a child.
Exasperated, he called for everyone to stop equating “womanhood” with “motherhood” and vice versa. He pointed out that “being born with a uterus doesn’t make conceiving or carrying a certainty,” so it doesn’t follow that all women can become mothers, or that all mothers carried their children themselves, or that all people who carry children are mothers. “No one can ever really know whether having children is possible until you try,” he added.
He continued, “The business of pregnancy… the entire institution of pregnancy care in America is centered around selling this concept of ‘motherhood’ [and] is so intertwined with gender that it was hard to escape being misgendered.”
Kaspar-Williams said that he had a full beard, flat chest, and the “male” gender marker on his documents, but “people could not help but default to calling me ‘mom,’ ‘mother,’ or ‘ma’am.”
Being able to conceive, carry, and give birth to his baby as a father gives him immense pride. “Nothing feels stronger than being able to say I’m a dad who created my own child,” he shared.
He added that “having a Dada and a Papa” is only natural to his son. Soon, when Hudson is old enough, they will tell him the story of how “Dada was the one who carried him and took care of him so he could come into this world.”
Source: New York Post